“Simping” is a modern-day insult used by adolescents and young adults to describe someone who is showing “too much emotion” for said incident, according to societal law. The current top definition on urban dictionary, which is the definition most commonly used, is “ Someone who does way too much for a person they like.” The word is used variously and somehow seems to relate to any act of kindness one does for another.
In recent occurrences when I have heard the term being used, it was when someone was either showing appreciation to someone they cared about, apologizing for a wrong they have done towards someone they cared about, or just simply caring about someone. If a boy decides to sacrifice a night with the boys and stay in with his girlfriend, he’s a simp. If a girl takes her boyfriend out to dinner (and pays), she’s a simp. If I offer to make up for any distress I have caused someone, either through a sincere apology or a kind gesture, I’m a simp. If a boy writes his girlfriend a love poem, he’s a simp. If a girl gives her boyfriend $200 to get himself together, she’s a simp. If a boy brags about the characteristics he likes in the girl he’s currently seeing, he’s a simp. If I decide not to use a boy for his money and instead teach him how to save his money, I’m a simp. If a boy calls a girl the morning after their first date, he’s a simp. If a boy asks a girl out on a first date, he’s a simp. If a girl surprises her boyfriend with Chick-fil-a on his lunch break, she’s a simp. What one person would call simping, another person may not, but every example I have given has once been followed by, “You’re a simp.” The term is derogatory and deceptive. Men are praised for their propensity to lewdness, and women are encouraged to manipulate a man’s bank account in exchange for fornication. It’s because of the word simp that people feel impelled to deceive, impelled to beguile, impelled to seduce. It’s a “hurt them before they hurt you” mindset, and while it is understandable, acceptable, and respected in today’s society, it’s fatal. It’s mentally, emotionally, and spiritually fatal.
When did caring about someone become a bad thing? When did acts of love and concernment call for disparagement? Each generation has become less and less chivalrous, and chivalry is no longer expected. But how can the rebirth of an honorable disposition become so belittling? Courtship has been replaced with “talking” and is now trivialized. Ironically, something so trivial and so minimized inflicts pain strong enough to cause heartbreak and sorrow. Day by day individuals are being conned into thinking their moral ways are reproachable, and naturally with insults comes insecurities. No one wants to be called a simp. So they would rather conform themselves to the iniquitous behavior of society, than to denounce society and risk their reputation.
I once had a similar mindset. I didn’t trust anybody and I didn’t like anybody. I didn’t go around deceiving people, but I would let my past experiences influence my behavior towards other people. It could have been someone who wanted to care, wanted to help, wanted to love, but I didn’t let them because I didn’t trust. Until I realized that when you walk around with that mindset, living that lifestyle, you’re never going to find that security because you’re not letting it in. A lot of people can admit that it is nice to have someone who cares, one who not only says they do, but shows they do. In fact, a lot more people can admit that they wish they had someone who cared. If everyone has the same degenerate mentality, who is going to be the one that cares? Similarly, what is the point of having a relationship if neither individual cares? Oh I forgot, there’s always sex. Somehow, that’s still not good enough. The ones idolizing the law of retaliation, an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, are the same ones longing for a “ride or die” companion and a relationship full of love, loyalty, and liaison. How is it fair of you to expect someone to trust you when you don’t trust anyone? Why is it that your loyalty is vague, but yet you require it of others, then complain when you’re not receiving it? I understand it’s hard to trust when you’ve been deceived. I know it’s easy to seek revenge when you’ve been mistreated. God wouldn’t put emphasis on forgiveness if He knew you were going to live a life where no one would hurt you, no one would trick you, no one would take advantage of you. You’re not going to. No one has lived a life free of deception. Satan is the ruler of the world (John 14:30) and Satan is deception. You have to forgive those who have hurt you, and recognize when someone cares about you. Which means you can’t get back at someone, or use someone for your own personal gain. You may have to turn the other cheek, you may have to sacrifice a night out with the boys if it pleases your girlfriend, you might not be able to swipe the Visas of your boyfriend who makes less than you, there may come a time when you have to apologize, there will be frequent moments when you have to show that you care, and there’s a word that everyone is going to call you: a simp.
The Merriam-Webster definition of “simp” is short for simpleton, which is a person lacking common sense. Somehow, society has mingled their ignorance and correlated it with a pushover or kiss-up. You’re not a pushover. You’re not a kiss-up. You’re not a simp. You just care, and contrary to societal law, that’s okay.
“And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God.”
– Romans 12:2 NKJV
